****INCOMPLETE HANDOUT SAMPLE****
MENTORING (The new ‘Discipleship’)
What is the first things that comes to mind when you think of that word?
Who has had a mentor? (hand up)
What experiences have you had with mentors? Personally I have had a mix of let downs and restorations.
It is my belief that we should all have a mentor and a mentored. Or two or three. Let me explain what I mean by that though.
Nothing to Offer V’s Uniqueness
Perfect V’s Transparent/Real
Knowing it all V’s Humility
Always the same V’s Dynamic V’s Formal
Forever V’s Intentionally timed
My mentoring experiences.
Bad (young = needed reliability)
Good (dif etc)
Being the Big Person.
Love and acceptance:
- Positive relationship.
- Only thing that statistically works in counselling.
- Contact, Difficult conversations, Look after the boundaries (I can mentor you but not always be on call etc)
- Lead by example in honesty, be honest about your struggles and when you don’t know the answer.
- Don’t put your struggles on them, but be honest enough with them so they know they are not along in theirs and that you are not perfect either.
- Answer their questions honestly.
- Kindness and love do not lie to avoid hurting somebody’s feelings.
- Teenagers – particularly boys need stability and a mentor who is available for less than a year often does more damage than good.
- Be clear about it if appropriate – don’t expect yourself to mentor them forever and don’t let them expect that if it’s not the case.
(C) Joel Young 2009